Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
