My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize