I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize