There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
