We're facebook friends in real life
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
