How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
