Christians are straight up FREAKS
1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
