forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
