I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Then again, he has huge mansions.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.