It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
