we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I just saw a hot homeless man
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
