We're facebook friends in real life
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
