Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
