Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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