It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
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