yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
