Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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