she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize