atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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