Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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