This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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