I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
