Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
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Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
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I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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