his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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