yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Don't tell me you're on acid again
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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