I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
