im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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