Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize