So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize