At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Randomize
