who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
dude i'm inner monologue high
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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