At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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