i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize
