I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
