He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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