You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
