HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
