If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize