your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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