no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I need a hoe opinion
go on
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
