Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize