youre lurking in front of me
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
