eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Randomize
