Just cropdusted the office
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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