Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
