just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
