We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize
