Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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