I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
