Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
