Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
